Compass Points

It seems to come from nowhere,
Though it's myself
Slowly breaking down.
This gaping cavity,
My passion removed-
And my commander along.
Where is steadiness
When I now need her?
What friends have I?
True? Untrusted?
What's the motive,
The status?
I move in seconds
From normal to tears
And I know it's caused
By my lack of control.
I have to be her,
Each,
All-
Perhaps not in equal measure
But each serves her
Own special purpose.
My compass points and spins,
Guides me, or tries,
And what choice have I
But to trust it?