30 November, 2012

Better than Bland

The way I see it,
There's the world, and there's me.
This is the advice:
Listen to all, but decide for yourself.
My battles or yours,
Everyone's are unique to them.
Some may be harder,
But we all have our own Hell.
Beneath my eyelids
This scene unfolds just for me,
In which there are
No silly love songs,
No sunny days,
No peaceful meadows.
I have my dark days,
My Karen blue nights.
I have my guarded pink mindset,
And my bed made of poppies.
But I have much more than this:
Endless ballads and revenge lullabies,
Sad hymns and gentle arias.
I have thunderstorms and
Snowy blizzards, hurricanes
And rainbow clouds.
And, rather than fields of bluebonnets,
I have this forest of oaks,
This line of mountains.
Isn't that much better than bland?
Isn't walking much better than riding?

26 November, 2012

Need

"Need" is such a nasty little word,
An overused term,
An unworkable slur.
I don't have need for
Anything of the sort-
Or for you,
Nor you for me.
"Need" is so common,
So overly dishonest.
There really is no such thing.
"Need" is such a rarity,
A funny little quirk.
I don't need this,
I won't need that.
I don't need you-
Or anyone at all!
And why do I pretend-
Do I delude myself
That I might want you?
Do I even miss you?
No, not at all:
"Want" is only a small step
From "need"-
Much more loosely defined,
Much less closely confined.
And both words negate
The very same thing.
Me and you.

19 November, 2012

A Bad Friend

Hello there, bad friend,
Are you angry still?
Not that it matters.
I wish you no ill.
I have all I need,
I chase what I want.
You have no place here-
No memory to haunt.
Happy holidays, bad friend,
I hope you spend them well.
Whatever they might mean;
Perhaps, even a quell.
You've never seen me cry-
Not once, in how long?
And yet, he has-
It just seems so wrong.
What's happened, bad friend?
Was it both or just one?
It's all over now-
The past is gone, done.
I have forgiven;
Forget, I'll never do.
Perhaps we'll move on-
But never know what's true.
Then again, does anyone?
I tell them they'll get scared;
That they won't want me
Once my whole self is bared.
They don't believe, bad friend-
Eventually I prove it.
Is that good or bad?
Can I improve it?
So once they realize,
And what I said comes to pass,
Again I'm torn apart-
But I know it can't last.
Good luck, bad friend.
I've moved on from this.
Old times, or him maybe-
But you, I won't miss.

18 November, 2012

A Good Friend

Hello my good friend,
I hope you are well.
Tonight I am tired,
I'm under some spell.
My world keeps changing,
My face grows hot.
Eyes burn for tears,
Useful or not.
It is fall, my good friend-
The weather is turning.
A chill sweeps the air,
And what are we learning?
Friends or enemies,
Or a whole new thing.
A new year approaches,
But what might it bring?
I'm growing, good friend;
I hope you will, too.
But where can I go?
What can I do?
My options keeps morphing,
Some good and some bad.
I'm gaining new things,
I've lost what I had.
Goodnight, my good friend,
Tomorrow will come
And today is almost over;
Yet I'm feeling so numb.
Priorities are different,
I've traded them around.
Not all has been lost-
I have been found.
Sweet dreams, my good friend,
And don't dream of me-
Let me sleep for once,
In the morning we'll see.

15 November, 2012

On Principle

1. This, too, shall pass.
2. Yes, we were.
3. I am what I am, and I'm not ashamed. Never be ashamed.
4. Never call anyone Master.
5. Take it or leave it.
6. You never have to put up with anyone who doesn't respect you.
7. Keep calm and conjure a Patronus charm.
8. I will walk differently.
9. The "F" word.
10. Don't make secrets.
11. Fight or die.
12. No regrets.
13. Catharsis.
14. Prioritize.
15. Who are me?
16. Don't knock it 'til you try it.
17. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
18. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
19. To each their own.
20. Don't call the kettle black or you're gonna get thrown in the fire.

This post currently under construction. Feel free to add your own in the comments below.

14 November, 2012

Vision

How funny is it?
That it really is obvious.
If only someone could
Pay a moment's attention,
Would open their mind
To what is staring straight
At them, directly in
Their line of vision-
But they don't see
Because they don't
Wish to see.
Logic conflicts with
Itself here-
On one side, who would assume?
Yet on the other,
All the signs are there!
If people weren't so
Judgmental, if they would just
Accept things the way they are,
They would see it.
Am I glad that they don't?
Or do I want them all to
Know it?
I'm getting double vision-
Two of you, two of me.
Close one eye, the other-
It changes, see?
The colors switch, the lines cross.
So I am choosing now-
Not to give up,
But to drop. To let it.
Forget this lost Lenore.
Refocus yourself-
Sharpen the outlines,
And the picture will
Fall into place.

Unlimited

Standing alone again,
Stepped to the side.
Pushing away what I
Wiggled around,
Giving up the dance.
Leave behind the coals
Pick it and stick it-
Yours matters most.
So tell them:
"This is how it will be."
If you have a problem,
Then forget it.
Drop it, leave it
On the floor, refuse
To lift it up.
Don't claim it again.
Decide what's really
Worth it, and
If it's not, toss it.
This isn't a game anymore.
This is life.
This is control.
This is Suicide, Unlimited.

01 November, 2012

Tell

Perhaps I hold onto too many
While others let them all go
These digital keepsakes
That I read over and over.
I tell myself to erase a few
Like a hoarder cleaning house
But again I hold on
And keep them for another day.
And maybe it's a bad idea
That will come back to haunt me
But there are some things that
I don't want to forget just yet-
Instead I remind myself often
Keep them always on my mind
Read them over again.
Save them for tomorrow.
Hope that, if anyone might see,
They won't understand.
Some of it is spelled out-
And for that, I keep it close.
How much do you trust your friends?
That much?
With all of your secrets?
Even the ones you've kept from yourself?
Think about it a moment.
Would you really tell?
Why haven't you already?
You know why. You're scared.
Maybe you know what they'll think.
Maybe you know it will break.
Just maybe, you know they can't keep it.
And what kind of friends are those?
Some would say none at all,
Before they realize it's theirs.