30 December, 2012

Light Me

How can you have stuck a song
That you've never heard before?
How can you fail even when
You've given it your all?
Why is it that a thought can
Slip and drip through your fingers?
I'm catching water but my
Thirst won't be sated,
My hunger not abated.
Haha... we're not immortal,
We're already dead!
Can you bury me?
Can you hide me from the world,
So that I might rise again?-
A different life, a stronger body,
A whole new set of rules!
Push me down, pick me up,
Frame me, blame me,
Humiliate and shame me.
Leave me here, send me there,
Fight me, bite me,
Kerosene and light me.
Waiting, always waiting-
Like I said, I have to breathe!
I can't stay dependent-
Who can I depend on?
It is all just an extent,
An extension of tense.
Keep it flowing,
What else to do?
Can't give up, not ever,
Not for anything.
Live and breathe, laugh and die.
Wake and sleep, fall and try.

20 December, 2012

An Off Night?

I suppose "interesting" will do:
I can't quite call it "bad",
But perhaps "good" is too much of a stretch.
Where is the line, though,
Between asleep and awake?
What is pure subconscious dream,
And what is only longing?
Oh Lord, can I truly handle this?
This horrid taunting as I lay defenseless,
This violent imagery that wakes me shaking,
Knees up, eyes wide, breath caught...
Soaked and sweaty and shattered.
Dear God, what am I doing?
Am I living and breathing,
Am I existing and changing?
Could I be losing it all,
Or perhaps have I already?
I slide around in this pit of mud,
The cold and wet my only company,
Holding on to the spark of sunshine
That sears my skin and blinds my vision,
Yet it's all that I have.
I own nothing,
Not the clothes on my back nor
The drenched earth that encompasses me.
I can't be sleeping late like this-
I can't subject myself to such punishment.
Can I write it away insignificantly
As just an off night?
I do believe it's something more,
My desperate longing that's barely even secret.
I'm sure everyone knows, although not to what extent.

16 December, 2012

An Off Day

I just feel like taking
My pink-painted fingernails
And shoving them deep into
My eye sockets and shredding
Every bit of flesh they find.
Why does my source of joy
Also fill me with dreaded hate?
I can feel it pulling, tugging,
Pushing everything away;
This is why I'm broken.
This, and everything else.
I call it just an off day,
Shrug and move along.
But meaning has shifted
In every little detail of my day.
The happy times make me question.
A simple color reminds me.
Something I once respected,
Now leaves me filled with disgust.
The past it may be,
But it affects the present.
I find myself keeping out an eye,
One ear pricked,
Auto-tuned to tidbits,
However hard I try to
Block it all out.
Accepted, yes, but I can't
Erase everything from my mind.
I catch myself shaking my head,
As if clearing the cobwebs,
But it alters naught.
The subconscious dream that now
Taunts my waking hours
Is one of my most fearful.
The one where I lose control.
In which I am brought back
By a most unlikely stimulant.
I've been doing better-
At least, until a few days ago.
Today I'm attacked on all sides:
This song, that band-
Even this, my music, my reprieve,
Is forever scarred.
A laugh echoes in my ears,
Refusing to leave me in peace.
Every close of the eyes
Leaves one image to vex me.
Can I even sleep tonight?
Do I even want to?
But to hide in the dark and quiet,
That sounds nice.
If I can shut everything out.
If I can end my off day.

08 December, 2012

For What It's Worth

Maybe maybe maybe
Is this what it's
Supposed to be?
What if what if,
Am I everything
I'm meant to be?
Is this quicksand?
Am I mud?
Is this tangible?
Am I real?
Have I let this go
A bit too easily, perhaps?
I'm wondering now
Whether it happened at all.
I imagine that maybe
Again I only confused
Myself into this thinking...
But when I truly remember,
What I recall is sweet.
A look, a touch, a day.
A dream, a sigh-
Sometimes I'm hit
By what is gone.
So much past,
Yet even more future.
I can't hold on anymore,
To what should have been.
In one outlet only
Can I consider my What if's,
The ones that have me buried.
Ha! To think,
That someone might take
Them a little too seriously.
It's sadly absurd,
But so, admittedly, real.
Is it true, that I
Can be bought?
Not with money, but
With promises?
So many promises,
Kept or forgotten;
Yours, mine, his, hers.
Too many secrets,
That we've all let slip.
I am at fault,
But I don't carry all
Of the blame!
That's only important to me-
No one else cares,
And I've accepted this.
Curiosity still tugs,
But it doesn't even matter.
I don't care to know,
To speak or to ask.
It's not worth it anymore.
Few things are.
The answer isn't worth
The question. The benefit won't
Outweigh the consequence.
It wasn't worth the compromise,
And so I lost it entirely.
That was by my own choice.
Now neither of them
Can see my worth,
And I've come to terms.
Matter, redefined,
Means that I look inside
Myself, and see truth,
And decide what's right.

03 December, 2012


As many times as we've
Been inside this building,
I doubt anyone could
Identify it by this picture.
Only a single color
Even hints at the place
That this once was,
So familiar to me in
My younger years.
This was my playground.
Would you let your child
Play here now, in these ruins?
It has fallen into such
Disrepair, gone to waste,
So that when I visited,
It tugged at my heart
To see what it has become.
See how it has been destroyed?
See, how time and carelessness
Have torn it apart, though
It still stands to hold
My memories in place.
I know these buildings
So well, I could draw
A map to guide you.
Could you? Do you know
What this is? Or, rather,
What it used to be?
Look here, how a new
Generation has left its
Mark, not caring what
This site might have
Represented in the past.
I remember so much here,
So many friends and people,
Teachers and mentors.
Most of all I recall
My mom here,
In this room where she
Spent her days, even
In the summer, for
So little recognition,
For meager earnings
To support her family.
What has happened here?
The walls are literally
Just torn to pieces,
The entire locale
Considered insignificant.
But it still holds significance!
It still stands, stares
At the outside world in defiance,
Declaring, "I am still here!"
And although it has been
Closed off, locked up tight
Against intruders of all kinds,
The outside is still free
For me to roam at leisure,
So that I can be reminded
Of all the minds that walked
Through here, that learned
And grew here, of all the
People that discovered
New things as they trudged,
Often unhappily, through
These now dilapidated
Hallways. And to what gain?
It is now that I ask
Of all my friends:
Do you remember this?
Are your memories fond,
Or sentimental at all?
Do you miss it, or
Are you glad to be gone?
Do you drive right past
And not even realize?
Does it phase you in the
Least, that it lies abandoned,
Sometimes the grass mowed
But otherwise neglected?
Years ago, it was cared
For and tended lovingly.
And now? Now it seems,
Some view it as a blight
On this town. But I see
It for what it is,
A small piece of history
That I could be a part of.
They knew they were
Building something for
The future, but do we?
Is it still Our Place,
Like it was when we
Were children?
When the world was new
And dramatic, when
Everything was life or death-
A simpler time? Perhaps.
I remember the rails that
Were here, when we sat
On the corners and talked
About anything at all,
Just to pass our few minutes
Of time before another
Reality check.
So much has been altered,
Demolished even,
And yet here it remains.
Here, also, is a reminder
That at one time it wasn't
So forlorn and forgotten.
It was a haven to some.
It was a whole world in itself.
It travels through time,
In its own way.
And even though it is cast aside,
So discarded that it doesn't
Even warrant a flagged pole,
I haven't forgotten,
Not in the least.
Little things here and there
Linger on to tell us
Of the activity that used
To exist here. It was
Never ceasing! These buildings
Never rested, they were alive
All year long. They lived
And breathed.
We made music here!
This is where we learned it!
And so many other things,
Even those that weren't
Taught. Even the sign
Still guards over
This ground, not yet
Erased, As a monument
To its repressed life.
Do you remember now?
Or did you ever forget?

01 December, 2012


I could write a book of lyrics
Of songs I won't listen to now,
Of memories I have destroyed.
I could write a song of sadness,
Or draw a line in stone.
I could die from all this crazy,
Be consumed if I let it out,
Be destroyed if I'm not careful.
I could allow these visions
To eat me from the inside,
To rip me on the outside.
I could live in that world,
In the memories and what if's,
In the surrealism of my mind.
I could lose myself deep
In the bottom of my shell,
In a place of maybe.
I could drop my heart,
And it would fall through me.
I could take this picture,
And in it, there'd be blood.
I could break my name-
But I've done that already!
I could take a run, take a leap.
I could sleep my day away,
I could throw up.
I could dwell on the things I've "seen"-
On that place where I was kept
After I snapped-
When I was overrun by the four of them
And they fought each other over me.
I wouldn't even respond!
It wasn't until he came,
And called another name-
Only then did some semblance of reality
Penetrate my being.
Only then did I notice how ragged
I had become. I was them-
Or they were me.
I lost control. I lost myself,
Amid the mix of those four.
They kept rolling through my mind
Like my own private mantra:
The clover, the bluebonnet,
The sweet pea, the rose.
Green, blue, pink, red.
But then he was there,
And for a moment I could function.
For a moment, I was all or none.
But I am so scared, that it might
Happen to me- that it's actually
Possible. Is it?

30 November, 2012

Better than Bland

The way I see it,
There's the world, and there's me.
This is the advice:
Listen to all, but decide for yourself.
My battles or yours,
Everyone's are unique to them.
Some may be harder,
But we all have our own Hell.
Beneath my eyelids
This scene unfolds just for me,
In which there are
No silly love songs,
No sunny days,
No peaceful meadows.
I have my dark days,
My Karen blue nights.
I have my guarded pink mindset,
And my bed made of poppies.
But I have much more than this:
Endless ballads and revenge lullabies,
Sad hymns and gentle arias.
I have thunderstorms and
Snowy blizzards, hurricanes
And rainbow clouds.
And, rather than fields of bluebonnets,
I have this forest of oaks,
This line of mountains.
Isn't that much better than bland?
Isn't walking much better than riding?

26 November, 2012


"Need" is such a nasty little word,
An overused term,
An unworkable slur.
I don't have need for
Anything of the sort-
Or for you,
Nor you for me.
"Need" is so common,
So overly dishonest.
There really is no such thing.
"Need" is such a rarity,
A funny little quirk.
I don't need this,
I won't need that.
I don't need you-
Or anyone at all!
And why do I pretend-
Do I delude myself
That I might want you?
Do I even miss you?
No, not at all:
"Want" is only a small step
From "need"-
Much more loosely defined,
Much less closely confined.
And both words negate
The very same thing.
Me and you.

19 November, 2012

A Bad Friend

Hello there, bad friend,
Are you angry still?
Not that it matters.
I wish you no ill.
I have all I need,
I chase what I want.
You have no place here-
No memory to haunt.
Happy holidays, bad friend,
I hope you spend them well.
Whatever they might mean;
Perhaps, even a quell.
You've never seen me cry-
Not once, in how long?
And yet, he has-
It just seems so wrong.
What's happened, bad friend?
Was it both or just one?
It's all over now-
The past is gone, done.
I have forgiven;
Forget, I'll never do.
Perhaps we'll move on-
But never know what's true.
Then again, does anyone?
I tell them they'll get scared;
That they won't want me
Once my whole self is bared.
They don't believe, bad friend-
Eventually I prove it.
Is that good or bad?
Can I improve it?
So once they realize,
And what I said comes to pass,
Again I'm torn apart-
But I know it can't last.
Good luck, bad friend.
I've moved on from this.
Old times, or him maybe-
But you, I won't miss.

18 November, 2012

A Good Friend

Hello my good friend,
I hope you are well.
Tonight I am tired,
I'm under some spell.
My world keeps changing,
My face grows hot.
Eyes burn for tears,
Useful or not.
It is fall, my good friend-
The weather is turning.
A chill sweeps the air,
And what are we learning?
Friends or enemies,
Or a whole new thing.
A new year approaches,
But what might it bring?
I'm growing, good friend;
I hope you will, too.
But where can I go?
What can I do?
My options keeps morphing,
Some good and some bad.
I'm gaining new things,
I've lost what I had.
Goodnight, my good friend,
Tomorrow will come
And today is almost over;
Yet I'm feeling so numb.
Priorities are different,
I've traded them around.
Not all has been lost-
I have been found.
Sweet dreams, my good friend,
And don't dream of me-
Let me sleep for once,
In the morning we'll see.

15 November, 2012

On Principle

1. This, too, shall pass.
2. Yes, we were.
3. I am what I am, and I'm not ashamed. Never be ashamed.
4. Never call anyone Master.
5. Take it or leave it.
6. You never have to put up with anyone who doesn't respect you.
7. Keep calm and conjure a Patronus charm.
8. I will walk differently.
9. The "F" word.
10. Don't make secrets.
11. Fight or die.
12. No regrets.
13. Catharsis.
14. Prioritize.
15. Who are me?
16. Don't knock it 'til you try it.
17. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
18. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
19. To each their own.
20. Don't call the kettle black or you're gonna get thrown in the fire.

This post currently under construction. Feel free to add your own in the comments below.

14 November, 2012


How funny is it?
That it really is obvious.
If only someone could
Pay a moment's attention,
Would open their mind
To what is staring straight
At them, directly in
Their line of vision-
But they don't see
Because they don't
Wish to see.
Logic conflicts with
Itself here-
On one side, who would assume?
Yet on the other,
All the signs are there!
If people weren't so
Judgmental, if they would just
Accept things the way they are,
They would see it.
Am I glad that they don't?
Or do I want them all to
Know it?
I'm getting double vision-
Two of you, two of me.
Close one eye, the other-
It changes, see?
The colors switch, the lines cross.
So I am choosing now-
Not to give up,
But to drop. To let it.
Forget this lost Lenore.
Refocus yourself-
Sharpen the outlines,
And the picture will
Fall into place.


Standing alone again,
Stepped to the side.
Pushing away what I
Wiggled around,
Giving up the dance.
Leave behind the coals
Pick it and stick it-
Yours matters most.
So tell them:
"This is how it will be."
If you have a problem,
Then forget it.
Drop it, leave it
On the floor, refuse
To lift it up.
Don't claim it again.
Decide what's really
Worth it, and
If it's not, toss it.
This isn't a game anymore.
This is life.
This is control.
This is Suicide, Unlimited.

01 November, 2012


Perhaps I hold onto too many
While others let them all go
These digital keepsakes
That I read over and over.
I tell myself to erase a few
Like a hoarder cleaning house
But again I hold on
And keep them for another day.
And maybe it's a bad idea
That will come back to haunt me
But there are some things that
I don't want to forget just yet-
Instead I remind myself often
Keep them always on my mind
Read them over again.
Save them for tomorrow.
Hope that, if anyone might see,
They won't understand.
Some of it is spelled out-
And for that, I keep it close.
How much do you trust your friends?
That much?
With all of your secrets?
Even the ones you've kept from yourself?
Think about it a moment.
Would you really tell?
Why haven't you already?
You know why. You're scared.
Maybe you know what they'll think.
Maybe you know it will break.
Just maybe, you know they can't keep it.
And what kind of friends are those?
Some would say none at all,
Before they realize it's theirs.

19 October, 2012


The worst part is
That I don't know-
Which one has me jealous?
One journey is
Just beginning, but
Will it be a short one?
And the other has
Been my path for some
Time. Years, I believe.
So long that I don't
Know, really, when it
First began. For so
Long I have traveled,
Have gone in circles
About myself, only
To arrive at the
Same place again
And again. And see!
Even now, it takes
Only two words,
And up I jump,
At every beck and
Call, in every cheesy
Way. A small question
Leaves me breathless-
I'm so hopeless!
I'm gone!
But at the same time...

I'm so desperate
To begin again,
To move forward
Rather than trudge
This soulless loop
For all eternity.
My only option is to
Try. And I am.
Sort of.
But I can't tell
How hard I should
Hold on, and how
Much I need to
Let go. Still, I
Give the effort.
I hate that the
Old things still
Chase me, things
That keep digging
Back out of the ground,
Skeletons in the closet
That somehow find
Their way out.
I want a new closet!
New things to put
In it! Can't I
Have a reprieve?
I'd like to be
Above this time!
I hate this "permission"
That perhaps my head
Has only created.
So many times
The wounds have
Been reopened-
They bleed again now,
When I thought they
Had healed for good.
Since when did I
Start wanting something
Normal? A relationship
Most of all. It seems
That all of mine are...

17 October, 2012

The Catch

This halo of a haven,
This bed that is all mine.
I share only when I wish
And when I do,
How heavenly it's been.
This aura of clovers
With an extra kick of something-
What is it? Lily pads?
It could be no other.
That sweet intoxication,
The mere presence of one,
This angelic little smile
That only shows in sleep-
Pure blissful calm,
Passing over me, too.
So for a night, I have it all.
These strings remain empty
For this sleep time,
And the sugar plums in my
Head twirl and twirl,
Without a care in their hearts.
I look up to see
This underwater canopy
And I drift into the most
Resting sleep that I can
Even remember...
So that it almost makes me
Cry to wake up, to know
That this night can't last
Nearly long enough.
I want it again.
I crave the company.
That night will live on
In my heart until my
Dying day- I will cherish
It every moment.
Hanging over my head
Is only a dream catcher-
No other nagging notions
To mar this lovely night.
Nothing is being thrown-
For now, I have escaped
The Catch.

10 October, 2012

Karen Blue

Save it for another day
This unlucky Karen Blue
Keep it to a single bud
This oppressing little hue.
Leave it out in the rain
Don't bring it back inside-
Let it grow in its place,
It's for nature to decide.
Sing it in a melody,
But now it's nothing more
Lock it in this box again
-Hiding shouldn't be a chore.
Plant yourself a garden
Some flowers, just a few
Overrun the bonnet,
This bleeding Karen Blue.
Roses, poppies, tiger lilies,
Surround this forest place.
Restore this torched circle
With a ring of growing grace.
This one is the hardest-
The final little clue.
Fight it with the others,
This relentless Karen Blue.
Uncover this bed of blossoms,
Put each petal away
Sleep in rainbow dreamland-
Let the colors disarray.
Smother desperate hunger,
Lose sight of that sensation.
Blend away this shade,
Avoid your own damnation.
Begin today all over-
It's not too late to start anew
Shake off all your sadness,
Evade this Karen Blue.

08 October, 2012

Kendahl Green

Take a look, tell-
What do you see?
Spin around: the
World is green!
Have a heart, and
Have some fun.
Break your streak,
Jump the gun.
Party for one, please-
Loud music with groove,
Now you can dance,
Let your day improve.
Live it when you breathe,
Feel it when you dream.
Shake off wasted time-
Sew back every seam.
See the right colors,
Take a stroll outside.
Block out the theme,
Forget your precious pride.
How's this for muchness?
"We're all mad here."
Cross all the lines,
Leave behind your fear.
Here is all your music-
Now is all you've got.
Pick out the clover
In every inkblot.
Feel the rumbling,
Revel in the rain.
Celebrate the clouds,
Feel it in each vein.
Run as it pours,
And let it all grow.
It's time for Kendahl Green,
Let the daring show.

07 October, 2012

For Yourself

Stressing it.
Since when does talking help?
It makes me dig.
And that hurts worse.
It hurts to feel-
That's why I keep it buried!
What am I supposed to want?
What is safe to feel?
Emotions are made to be dangerous.
I can't stand the single things,
The little moments that
Shoot straight through you,
The ones that pang so
Roughly and kill you inside.
They linger and rip you.
The ones that flip you
Outside in,
Fill you with the most harsh
Sense of hatred-
For yourself.
This is real for me.
Does no one understand?
Do they think that I'm
Not serious? This bile
In my throat, this
Tremble in my veins.
On all sides are only
Walls, no curtain to
Fall through. I throw
Myself against them
But only damage myself.
Crouching in the corner,
Clawing at my face.


For every conversation
My heart makes itself known.
It pulses so quickly,
Hitches my breath.
In my belly swarms
A hundred butterflies,
Each a different reason
To keep my mouth shut.
This lump in my nerves,
The knot in my throat-
This teenage situation.
Why can't I just be free?
How can I handle this?
I can't afford to fumble.
I couldn't bear it.
And every little thing
Gets it all started again.
Step forward, slide back.
Pink and red,
Pink and red.
Everything clenches,
Tightens in suspense,
And my thoughts go racing
From reality to wishes
And, sometimes, to despair.
My stomach fills with
Battery acid and threatens
Me through every moment.
And when my eyes are closed...
You know what i want.
-Not what some would think.
Just the simple actions,
The gentle touch,
The softest kiss.
Those whispered words
And hands that wipe tears.
Being held for comfort.
Wake up! Get real!
Don't ever delude yourself!
And resist the pretending.
Deep breaths,
Slow the cardio.
Wanting to run for it.
Needing to scream.
This craziness,
This torment,
It stalks me every minute!
Every time I stand
The room spins-
Half the time my
Fingers shake.
I can't breathe!
And then, I see-
And briefly I am normal.
First thing, last sight-
Every thought!
And it rolls and rolls.

05 October, 2012

Just How Much

What do you say?
How can you be there
And gone all at once?
How do you show someone
That you care, without
Reminding them of
Just how much?
How can you bear your soul
Yet still keep it hidden?
To a person who has everything,
How would you offer empty hands?
It's obvious that I've
Held back- how can I not?
It makes me sick!
I hate not showing!
And I ask myself how much
Worse it could be.
I'm far too afraid to find out,
And I couldn't do that anyway.
They have made sure I know that.
I wear my mask,
I hide in my garden,
And I wish to dance in this music
That surrounds my sanctuary.
The tree towers over me,
And a solemn harvest moon
Peeks at me through its limbs.
I cower in a shadow,
For that is all I am-
A shadow of myself,
From me, but not me.
What do you say,
When you look into those eyes
And see everything;
Everything you can't have.
I can't rid myself of these
Dreams that won't be caught,
Because, although they torment
Me, they can never be called
Nightmares. Those, I can handle,
But this dream simply won't
Let me be!


I'm amazed at how free I feel
At how open I am-
This experience is enthralling!
I'm so surprised at the
Overwhelming amount of support
I'm getting from all sides.
It's getting me excited about this!
Doing what I really want- and
Loving every minute.
I find myself submerged,
Completely buried in my new work.
This is what I was made to do.
This is my calling.
My mood is lifted whenever
I write, and I love to see my words
Springing to life in so many ways.
My inspiration comes from my
Encouragement, and I'm so happy
That I get so much. I love this
Story! I feel that it has such
Wonderful direction, and very
Real characters- I only hope I
Do them justice in bringing them to
Life, in describing their story
In the most crafty way that I can.
And if I fail, I will try again-
Nothing will keep me from this.
This is mine.
It won't be taken from me-
I won't let it. This is my life.
I will follow it until my dying day.

03 October, 2012

Kimi Pink

Kimi's in love and
She knows what's true;
Kind and tender,
But so much is new.
Her eyes are dancing
While they hide so much.
Fearful and shy,
Wanting someone to trust.
The only one to calm her,
The one who makes her smile-
If only she could understand
And learn to see the style.
Kimi's alone and she's
Feeling confused.
If these are her friends,
Why does she feel so used?
She just wants that one who
Makes her feel so abloom-
She longs to be held
By one who won't assume.
Kimi's in the garden-
She's meeting somebody there.
Out of all the blossoms,
Not a one can compare.
Hidden outside is
A frog all alone.
She wants to hide,
But her cover is blown.
Kimi's revealed, now
She can't take it back.
Fighting her tears,
But she's going to crack.
Kimi's in love but
Still she's so alone.
She's in the garden
And all on her own.

01 October, 2012

Kadence Red

In all honesty, she is
The embodiment of my hypocrisy.
She is far from perfect,
As she very wells knows.
Yet she is everything about me
That is judgmental and hateful.
Much more opinionated than I,
And not afraid to speak her insults.
Somehow, I keep her in check.
So easily angered, making it a test
To keep her separate, as I have
Resolved to do for my own sanity.
I need this Kadence, to keep me
Tethered to the most important thing-
How hard it is on my peace of mind,
For me to need her! It tears
At my morals- but so does
Everything else!
Kadence asks if I ever even had any.
I hate to wonder if she's right.
They can't all be right!-
That's why I have separated them
And continue to explore them even if,
Perhaps, it is only leading to my own
Deterioration. But she questions everything!
And I never know what is worth the
Question. Be on the safe side?
But I'm so bad at that!
And so, yes, I constantly question
Anything. I need her for
Her motivation; without it,
I would only be exchanging
One extreme for the other-
And this thought leaves me
At a perpetual impasse, torturing
My thoughts into half-baked actions.
I think, most excruciating of all,
Is the way she splits my mind between
Ultimate love and hate, causing my
Insecurity in regards to what is
Tangible, and what is only
Mist upon the water.

29 September, 2012


This weather is so
Fitting, so perfect for me
At present. Will I ever
Get out of this?
Won't I ever be able
To function as I
Should? I can't focus,
I can't eat:
I either roll and
Dread all night, or lack
The energy to keep
My eyes aloft through
The day. My bed
Is draped with
Poppies and bluebonnets,
Enticing, calling for me.
It is as though her
Arms have wrapped around
Me, and she whispers
In my ear: whispers
Dark things, colors
My world with a single
Tint of Karen blue.
Every time I think,
My head goes spinning
And I can hardly
Ever find the drive to
Concentrate on a single
Thing, a single idea,
For long enough to be
Me? Productive?
I wish! I'm far
Too busy skipping across
This insane rainbow
Of myself that twists
And turns through the
Clouds, never deciding
Where it might lead.
When ever have colors
Been less joyful than this?